Thinking | BAReed Writing, Business Writing

What Virtue in Acceptance?

Personal Growth, Work Life September 19, 2013 Leave a comment

Pick your battles, my mom used to say. She was referencing child rearing, but it applies in other aspects of life just as well, certainly at work. She was right about the child rearing part that is for sure; I wish that I had done a few early things differently. But I learned, and I started to apply this thought to many things.

How do you decide what to welcome, or accept?

Virtue doesn’t seem to be a popular word or idea these days. And yet there is virtue in having virtue since it is a good or admirable quality or property.

We have all heard of the Serenity Prayer, and there is definite power to accepting the things that we cannot change when including the wisdom for knowing what those things might be. Then again, we should thank our lucky stars for the people who challenge conventional wisdom now and again about the things that we cannot change. Sometimes we can, collectively, have a go at these things. Tipping at windmills in groups has been known to affect change when it seemed acceptance was virtuous. One person’s belief that they can affect change can spread.

Yet acceptance can be calming when applied to things that we cannot change, that are outside of our control. The virtue comes in saving our energy for affecting change where we do have control. In questioning the wisdom of everything, not accepting, we become malcontents. Monday starts your work week and insists upon rolling around every week? Acceptance of this inevitability is calming. A rule no longer has basis in reality after the latest round of changes, tip at that windmill.

Do you see virtue in acceptance?

Education and Learning

Personal Growth, Work Life, Writing September 18, 2013 Leave a comment

Academie des Sciences c1671 (photo credit Wikipedia)

There is a great deal in life to learn, to be taught.

“Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing worth knowing can be taught.”

~ Oscar Wilde, “The Critic as Artist”

Education can introduce us to previously unknown topics, and willingness to learn will be the key to gaining knowledge.

In Our Circles

Job Search, Personal Growth, Work Life September 16, 2013 Leave a comment

Growing up, The Carol Burnett Show was part of prime family time each week, bits and pieces of the skits becoming part of our family vocabulary and identifying points. Madeline Kahn was a frequent guest on the show and one of her skits where she played a pretentious acting coach for Eunice was a favorite for us. Something that Madeline says repeatedly in this skit, ‘in our circles, in our circles, in our circles’ became part of our family sayings.

Madeline Kahn publicity shot

Madeline Kahn was spoofing Method Acting concepts for great hilarity, but this phrase has come to represent both an effort to center myself and a way to be aware of my comfort zones. Even when firmly in our comfort zones, we can still need to center ourselves at times. And we really need to be aware of how to center ourselves when we are outside of our comfort zones.

Madeline Kahn had this wonderfully rich, theatrical voice and I can still see her now – head slightly tilted forward, eyes closed and hands circling around as she chanted, ‘in our circles, in our circles, in our circles’. (Carol Burnett as Eunice lapping it all up and imitating every action.) This is a great example of how humor can impact us well beyond the stress-relieving immediate laughter.

Remaining centered is a supreme act all in itself most of the time. Things, events, people are all working quite hard, and seemingly deliberately, to push us off center. Out of our circle.

Our comfort zones can hold us back from progress – at work, in relationships – because the next thing that we need is beyond the perimeter of comfort. Out of our circle.

Some people have a fairly easy time adjusting to unfamiliar and making it part of their comfort zone and others really struggle. Of course capability to adjust can be affected by how much the new thing is wanted, needed or liked – except for people that really can’t deal with change.

Full disclosure – I am actually writing this one for myself because my comfort zones are shifting and I needed to remind myself that it’s ok. I thought it might be a message that would resonate for others as well, so I’m sharing.

In our circles, in our circles, in our growing shifting circles.

Making Things Happen

Business Writing, Writing September 11, 2013 Leave a comment

We all start out with dreams of our adult lives.

“If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with success unexpected in common hours.”

~ Henry David Thoreau

We need to remember that advancing in the direction of our dreams looks very different at various stages of our lives, but we shouldn’t stop advancing.